Lizard removal by mortgage bill method

So It was a wild day at work. I'm home now and absolutely exhausted. I crack a diet cream soda and head outside with the dogs. Its on 94 degrees at the moment, not too bad. The dogs are frantically looking for lizards. Pretty typical. The day they catch one will be a red letter day. They corner something under the water spicket and so its time to go in, as it might be a scorpian. Princess is easy to get inside, but Flynn is stubborn. I finally round her up, like a sheep or something. She goes in the back door ahead of me and Princess is standing there staring at a lizard on the kitchen floor. What is a lizard doing in the kitchen? Flynn sees it and is quite shocked (just about as much as me) to see a lizard in the kitchen she doesn't know what to do. I tell both dogs to "STOP" and they back off. Their probably thinking "We gotta see Donna get a lizard for a change". The lizard looks in shock. So I grab the closest peice of paper I can find. Its the mortgage bill. Hmmm. How ironic. I kneel down and work the mortgage bill under the lizard. He's pretty calm considering his circumstances. I get him on there and walk outside. I think, where would a little lizard like to be this evening. How about the beautiful rock wall Jim buildt. I put him down and push him off the mortgage bill. There. He's breathing hard. He probably is in shock. I better get my camera. I wonder why I decided it was a "he"?

Oh, by the way, the lizard was, at the most, an inch long.